This is precisely how I live my life. Why so judgmental, XKCD?

Sliding down the banisters of the ivory tower.
This is precisely how I live my life. Why so judgmental, XKCD?

Apple customarily comes late to the game, sitting and watching and then releasing its own, usually better, take on the current offerings. If Apple went to a party, it would turn up last and leave with the hottest girl there.
I’m way more excited about the new Apple laptops than I should be, but my MacBook is getting elderly, and like any venerable friend, it has its issues — three replaced keyboards and another one that needs it except that I can’t be without it for long enough, power management issues, and it won’t run any of the games I want (okay, that’s probably a good thing for my productivity).
Also I’m a geek.
The LHC has been switched on, and the universe does not appear to have been destroyed. (Check here for periodic updates.) Our subjective experience of existence continues. However, this doesn’t prove anything: we have no way of knowing that this universe is the same one we started in. The LHC may have weakened the barriers between parallel universes, transporting us from one to the next without warning.
So how can you tell? We at Iqra’i, with our extensive scientific experience, are here to help, with 10 Ways To Tell If You’ve Been Transported To An Alternate Universe.

If you experience some or all of these symptoms, consult your nearest quantum mechanic.
Iain Dale is the undisputed king of British bloggers. He’s also a committed conservative and has a long career behind him of print publishing, political journalism and activism. So when he failed to be selected for the “A-list” of centrally-approved electoral candidates to be fast tracked into a winnable seat, many were shocked. Did Central Office not realise just how potent internet celebrity can be when fighting a campaign? Or were they warning that a searchable history of independent minded critique is a major bar to promotion under the party standard?
The perfect irony is that the “secret” list of local candidates with this central sanction was leaked to the outside world only thanks to…another leading conservative blog, ConservativeHome - which incidentally, is behind this wonderful campaign against anti-Americanism. ConservativeHome is more successful as a massive source of information on the movement, with a range of different feeds, while Iain Dale has the cult of personality of a star solo commentator and more name recognition outside political circles. That fact that both can thrive, along with Guido Fawkes, a superficially anonymous parliamentary rumormonger, shows that there’s still plenty of space in the market.
That’s the story behind today’s column by Dale in the right-leaning British newspaper, The Daily Telegraph. With his usual delicate tact, Dale politely suggests that the Conservative Party has been so suspicious of the independence of bloggers that it has focused on distancing itself from the community rather than integrating within it.
They may be Conservative but they won’t trot out the party line like a robot. So CCHQ views them with suspicion, so much so that they have now deleted any links to Conservative blogs (apart from ConservativeHome and those written by Tory MPs and councillors) on their website. How very short-sighted…[given that] Conservatives.com gets fewer hits than many of the top blogs…and blog readership is increasing by between 30 per cent and 50 per cent each year.
Of course, any organization which views independence as the problem fails to understand the internet. The aesthetic of the internet is defined by its slight distance from ‘real life’, and the accompanying sense of liminality. Any media that can be produced by one guy with an computer draws its identity from its grassroots feel - and you won’t integrate into the online community unless your fellow bloggers feel you are one of them. And a blog depends on the online community with a strange paradox - bloggers compete for market share all the time, but you won’t get anywhere unless people respect you enough to link to you, repay citations with a spot on their blogroll and welcome you as part of a cultural network, rather than a set of pedestals for individuals. The system is based on mutual self-congratulation and hat tipping. Which is why a blog has to have the sociability of an individual, rather than an organization - particularly in this super-cynical age in which retaining a PR officer is enough to make any media bunny distrust an institution. The Dems and the Republicans have official blogs but they’re not picked up much by the rest of the blogosphere - yesterday’s live video feed of the Democratic Convention had only attracted nine comments at the time of writing. Their successes come from their support of independent, personable bloggers, bringing bloggers together at special ‘bloggers briefings’ from major think tanks and policy departments, facilitating live-blogging and minute-by-minute reporting with Twitter feeds of campaign events, and lending approval to new media support centers like Techrepublican.com and the Republican Technology Council.
Dale’s is a timely call for the Conservative Party to embrace the blogosphere.
Once the US election is out of the way, the Tories need to recruit the Republican Party’s best internet brains and use them to drag their web operations into the 21st century.
So maybe that could translate into jobs for Nicky and me?
I’m still buzzing from Andrew Sullivan citing my Transhumanist post in the Daily Dish. Of course, my favourite bit of the Simon Barnes piece I’d originally sparked off was his finale:
It is required behaviour at such a point for the journalist to give all the answers to the world’s problems in a couple of pithy phrases and then go to the pub.
So by extension, the blogger is luckier - it is required behaviour for the blogger to collate a few sources, briefly sketch out the complexity of all the world’s problems, and then, leaving one’s readers to go to puzzle out their own solutions, to go to the pub.
So just for Andrew Sullivan, the King of Bloggers, here’s my thank you present - my vision of the future of Olympic advertising:

Reason reports:
…the Office of the Director of National Intelligence wants to “study the emerging phenomenon of social (particularly terrorist) dynamics in virtual worlds and large-scale online games.”
Studying emerging social phenomena in MMORPGs sounds really interesting, and I’m sure there’s a lot of fascinating market analysis to be done in the World of Warcraft auction house, but terrorism? Really? I’m pretty sure my mad Mind Flay skills are preparing me for nothing except a sad, lonely life.
Luckily, commenter Esher Fern Gamble has the only appropriate response:
They came first for the Orcs
and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t an Orc
Then they came for the Blood Elves
and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Blood Elf
Then they came for the Dwarves
and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Dwarf
Then they came for me
and by that time no one was left on the server.
This is all very bad for me. I’ve gone cold turkey on WoW…twice.
ETA — Also, this: “I hear that Pelosi’s not too tough a boss in the House wing, but those waves of Congressmen before her get kinda tedious.”
ETA 2 — A better subject line, in retrospect, would have been “Osama is with Mankrik’s Wife.” But it’s too late now, and I am revealing myself to be an even bigger geek than anyone knew.
The Personal Democracy Forum was, unsurprisingly, awesome. Highlights:
In other news, I have engaged in single combat with PHP and CSS. After my victory in our epic battle, I bring you the blog’s new look.
If you have any suggestions or things that you’d like changed, shoot me a comment. Or an e-mail. Or whatever other form of electronic communication floats your seastead.
For anyone who’s read the news flashed around the world this week about the latest supposed differences between “gay brains” and “straight brains”. Cognitive researcher Mark Lieberman has a great piece here dissecting the bunkum statistics in this latest piece of junk science. (Thanks to Adrian).
I usually get to go to Heritage’s bloggers briefing, and it’s good fun. Today, though, I learned something shocking: apparently, there are conservatives who aren’t in favor of net neutrality.
This just doesn’t make any sense. The story of the Internet is the prime example of how markets are supposed to work: anyone can enter, and the best ideas, content, and products win out. If I have a brilliant idea, I’ll be wildly successful (Google); if I have a terrible idea, I’ll fail miserably (Pets.com).
I can put anything on the Internet, because there are no gatekeepers on content. I still have to find viewers, but if I provide a better product, I’ll get them. The only advantage that established companies have is their brand recognition and that doesn’t stick around for long. What search engine did you use before Google? Do you even remember?
So why do we need net neutrality legislation? Because this entire paradigm — all the innovation this delicate balance of market forces can foster — is now threatened.
When Good ISPs Go Bad: A Cautionary Tale
Say my ISP wants to make an extra buck. MySpace offers them ten million dollars to speed up connections to MySpace and slow down connections to Facebook. Later on, I want to waste some time on the web. MySpace is so much faster than Facebook, so I’m going to do it there instead. Now my decision is based on who paid my ISP more, not the content of the site. This hurts my ability to make choices, and the quality of the goods on the market.
Now my ISP has found this blog post complaining about their relationship with MySpace. They’re not pleased, so they decide to prevent their customers from accessing TechRepublican. (Great Firewall of China, anyone?)
A few weeks later, my ISP announces that it’s got a fantastic new advance: documents and e-mails will travel much faster than before, at the expense of YouTube videos — the folks using YouTube are probably just procrastinating. Businesses and grandmothers are happy, but there’s a problem. To do this, my ISP has to be able to see what’s inside my packets. It’s reading my data.
This is all legal.
Opponents of net neutrality say I might be protected from some of these abuses by existing anti-trust laws, though at the Heritage briefing former Clinton aide Mike McCurry wasn’t quite sure. Anti-trust law, however, won’t make sure that ISPs do what they’re supposed to: treat all packets equally.
Mr. McCurry thinks we should develop “smart pipes,” as opposed to the “dumb pipes” we have now. (Doesn’t he know it’s a series of tubes?) The goal is to make sure that important information can travel more quickly. Unfortunately, there’s only one way to do this: deep packet inspection. “Smart pipes” only work by inspecting the data that travels through them, and that only works by violating our privacy.
“If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear!” net neutrality opponents assure us, and after all, no one would ever dream of using our private information against us. Really, we should just sit back, relax, and let all the innovation be strangled out of the marketplace. Also, I got this really great offer from the Prime Minister of Nigeria. All he needs is my bank information…
Net neutrality legislation isn’t regulation for the Internet. It allows for a level playing field that lets the Internet work as a model of free market efficiency. And that’s something every conservative can get behind.
Cross-posted at TechRepublican.
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